Live Bloggin'

9:29 Report from the AP: Larry Brown is already frustrated with Gerald Henderson and is calling around looking for buyers.

9:25 Other notable 19th picks: A man named Tiny and common criminals.... We'll see you in court Teague!

9:22 Roy Williams is texting recruits: If you commit to this program I will get you drafted WAY too high.

9:13 And the 8 PPG dynamo fell this far?!?!?!?!

9:08 Jay's guest commentary: James Johnson??? A big guy who isn't physical enough to play the four and doesn't have the skill set to play the 3 at an NBA level? How can my team draft Marcus Fizer twice in my lifetime? I demand reparations.

9:08 Is it national Prince day? Why is everyone wearing purple?

9:02 Is Daye Prince's cousin with a dentist?

9:00 Jay: The Bulls should pick Blair just for retaliation against Rondo or Mullins to fill the hole that's been missing since Armstrong left....
Me: I think they could use one more forward

8:55 Wait, is Phoenix trying to get all the guys from Golden State?! Awesome!

8:50 Wait, I was just kidding! I didn't really mean that you should draft Jeff Foster Part Deux! Has anyone noticed that his highlight reel is him falling? Best "Must Improve" of the night: Finish above the rim.

8:45 Wait, you were right...Henderson is funnier. Clippers East, you've outdone yourselves once again.

8:44 PLEASE BE HANSBROUGH! I BEG OF YOU!

8:40 BEST SUIT OF THE NIGHT goes to Terrence Williams. It's Johnny Cash meets Silver Surfer. But how will LeBron enjoy playing with him (I can dream right?)

8:37 Still trying to figure out why Orlando made this trade....

8:27 Bosh, I will help you pack your bags.

8:25 I fully expect Rachel Nichols to drop dead from the cigarette breath emitting from Donnie Walsh's mouth.

8:22 FIRE ISIAH!

8:21 This marks the 10th time tonight that I've said, "Earl Clark would be a good pick at this point." I am a sports genius.

8:18 Dell Curry has that look that says, "blah...blah...do you see my wife? I mean just look at that!"

8:14 Dr. Spaceman says: Johnny Flynn's entire body stopped growing when he broke a growth plate in his ankle. Also, there's no way of knowing where the human heart is.

8:05 Surprisingly, no one looks upset to go where they're going so far. Also, this is probably the most interesting point of the night. What's this fly by night franchise going to do for their second pick?

8:00 Old man rant: If you want to "Market Yourself" why pull your hat over your face?

7:52 Not much to say right now except that I LOVE THE BOW TIE AND BEARD!

7:43 Why do I think that in the Memphis war room they're just picking names out of a hat? No matter who they get, it won't work.

7:40 Is it just me or is Griffin dressed like how I think old school brothel owners dress?

7:36 Are they seriously on the clock? Do I sense some last second hesitation? How do you feel about DeMar DeRozan?

7:33pm So I just ran out of work like a donkey eating a waffle and I'm sitting in a bar with the college of adviser of Jordan and I. Away we go....

Jennings: Rubio can lick my balls

Of course that was Jared Jennings from this hostel over here, but the real Brandon Jennings has said as much according to SI.com. And since I'm a little....tired....I have two words for the Oak Hill Academy alum: Jeff McInnis.

Getting Married...MOCK DRAFT TIME!

So this Saturday, to much fanfare and blaring of trumpets, I am getting married.

I am very excited, and not just for the food and the ability to not invite people to the wedding that I've been meaning to distance myself from. As a married man I will be able to punch people and leave a ring-shaped indentation on their forehead. I also will be able to grow that 8 inch handlebar moustache I've been meaning to grow with little to no fear of having no contact with a woman again. More than anything, when I have lost all of my money and car in a high stakes poker game, I can take my wedding ring off and put it on the table in a dramatic move that makes everyone in the room gasp.

Despite my very happy and exciting happenings, I would be a poor host if I didn't talk about the event that stands as the last sports-related thing I will care about this summer (sorry baseball) THE NBA DRAFT!

Here is The Howeva Files' 2008 Mock Draft. All of these will be right. Oh, you don't think so? Care to make it interesting? (Tosses wedding ring on the table as he twiddles last poker chip in trembling hands)

1) Bulls - PG Derrick Rose Surprised? Then you are a moron.

2) Heat - PF Michael Beasley Sleazy Riley will be back when he revives the Heat.

3) Wolves - G OJ Mayo McHale brings the nutjob home. This should be fun!

4) Sonics - G Jerryd Bayless Oklahoma City gets its point guard. Seattle shrugs.

5) Grizz - C Kevin Love Too similar to Big Country Reeves to NOT be a Grizzly.

6) Knicks - SF Danilo Gallinari A good pick for D'Antoni. Score one for Little Italy.

7) Clippers - SF Joe Alexander Why not? He'll be out of here if he's good anyways.

8) Bucks - SG Anthony Randolph A reach here. Bucks drafts are comedy genius.

9) Bobcats - C Brook Lopez Twins part I. The lone Bobcats fan cheers.

10) Nets - G Russell Westbrook Could work out well in NJ.

11) Pacers - D.J. Augustin Short guards make the world go 'round.

12) Kings - G Eric Gordon Good guard for the Maloofs to waste away.

13) Blazers - SG Brandon Rush This guy's stock is flying up. Blazers trying to trade pick.

14) Warriors - SF Mareese Speights Work ethic of a slug, but talented as hell

15) Suns - SF Donte Greene Extremely athletic and could go much higher.

16) Sixers - PF Darrell Arthur With Dalembert, this team would be "team rebound".

17) Raptors - C Kosta Koufos Raptors want a center, and this is one they can develop.

18) Wizards - C DeAndre Jordan A "Jordan" is back on the Wiz! Like old times!

19) Cavs - C Alexis Ajinca A steal this late. Lebron nods "yes" while on a throne of gold.

20) Nuggets - SG Courtney Lee This guy's draft stock flew over the cookoo's nest.

21) Nets - PF J.J. Hickson The complete lack of a low post in NJ gets some help.

22) Magic - C Robin Lopez Wanted Lee. No one likes a crummier twin. The Magic do.

23) Jazz - C Roy Hibbert Stone hands finds a home in Sloanville.

24) Sonics - C JaVale McGee Center whose stock dropped like Enron. Good pick here tho.

25) Rockets - SG Chris Douglas-Roberts CDR and TMAC: Abbreviations are D.U.M.B.

26) Spurs - SF Nicolas Batum Spurs are the safety net for talent that slips through.

27) Hornets - G Mario Chalmers Solid depth for a playoff team.

28) Grizzlies - SG J.R. Giddens Wanted CDR or Lee with this pick. Gasol > Giddens.

29) Pistons - SF Bill Walker Dumars likes the injury-plagued forward. Ow!

30) Celts - PF Jason Thompson Because PJ Brown should leave any day now.

And there you have it. I'll think of you all fondly as I step down the aisle. Toodles.