Real NBA Superstars Wipe Themselves With Leaves

I absolutely love these outtakes/interviews/candid videos from the "redeem team" commercial shoots. It's like someone took all of the sheen and filters off of the stars and told them to behave as they normally would.

Take, for instance, this interview with Deron Williams and Chris Paul. I've often wondered what I would bring if I went on a camping trip. While my natural inclination would be to say a bed or something to shelter my body from the pounding elements and grizzlies, Chris Paul has a good point and made me realize that Little Debbie Snack Cakes (when given enough of them) could make a rather comfortable bed.

And Now For Something Completely Different

Not much in the news today, but let's take a break from the Slow News Day Cheerleader Of The Day. Labor Day Weekend is almost upon us, and that means kids are going back to school, football is about to end the abysmal sports summer (baseball fans...even you are unable to watch baseball games on television more than twice a week for risk of losing your own sanity to boredom), and we get to spend some quality time with friends.

To be honest, I really can't think of a good photo/video to emphasize labor day weekend...and for that reason let's just watch this:

Oh Crap

Marcus Williams, put down those stolen laptops because you've become the only healthy option your team's got left at point guard! Sadly, Monta Ellis is going to be out at least 3 months after tearing an ankle ligament playing pickup. Don't give me that "for the love of the game" bull MJ! Monta's wheel is going under the knife because of guys like James Catusco:

DWIGHT HOWARD GOT DUNKED ON (and USA won the gold)

Lebron Likes To Shake It.

When I'm not saving kids from burning orphanages in a most heroic fashion, or setting fire to orphanages, I'm usually patrolling Youtube.com for various ridiculous videos. I maintain that Youtube is the best website ever created (which is saying something given the other fine sites out there, such as Unicorn Dreams). I think this for no other reason that at any given hour I can see up to 80 ugly folks playing video game soundtracks on their keyboards.

Today I stumbled upon some offscreen footage of Lebron James between takes while filming commercials. Apparently he likes to dance. The best part is how the other players try awkwardly to look the other way (exhibit A is Chris Paul near the end of the clip) because...well...what do you say when a guy is dancing and looking at you? "Oh...hey...nice, uh...moves, Lebron...Oh...you're still dancing? Well...um...I'm going to grab a Coke. See you in a bit." (runs quickly away while Lebron continues to bob up and down with a creepy grin on his face).

Anthony Carter Will Make Up Your Mind For You!

When it's the weekend, the world is your oyster. So many decisions, so little time.

LET ANTHONY CARTER MAKE THOSE DECISIONS FOR YOU!

Hornets Get New Uniforms And Logo...Doesn't Suck!

I'm so used to silly-looking (Bobcats) or named (THUNDER! KAPOW!) NBA teams, that when a team actually comes through it kinda surprises me. Such is the case with the new look Hornets. For so long, the team ambled about in their silly sneakers-wearing Georgia Tech Yellow Jacket ripoff logo-ed digs. Now to match the newfound respectability Chris Paul and company have given them, check out the new logo above in collectable puzzle form (formerly their secondary logo, which I complained time and again they needed to make their primary logo...thanks for listening Bourbon Street!)

Below is their new logo, which reminds me of the New Orleans-themed Showboat Casino in Atlantic City. I love them. Totally redid the look of the team to represent the area they play in.

Er....wait a second. Says on their team store that THIS is their new primary logo...a more cartoony remake of the Yellow Jackets ripoff:

Hold the Stephone. This team remake was cruising for a solid A+...but keeping that looney tunes bee logo for anything other than a secondary "put this on the side of our shorts and that's it" would be a major letdown. It would downgrade them to a B. I surely hope they go with the Fleur De Lis (it looks like the website is highly promoting that one). It has cool pointy insect hands and everything.

Anyhoo, congrats to New Orleans fans, as well as beekeepers.

Slow News Day Cheerleader Of The Day: 76ers

Not feeling too well today, and I never get sick, so to keep my Cal Ripken-esque streak of healthy days intact I'm keepin' it short today.

Slow news day. Cheerleaders. Philly. Insert cheesesteak joke here.

Alright, bed time!

Sorry, Kids...You Have To Wait On That Joe Smith Jersey

Today the unnamed Oklahoma City team (THUNDER! KAPOW!) said that they will wait to announce the acquisitions of Joe Smith, Desmond Mason, and Kyle Weaver until they have their jerseys, colors, and team name sorted out. You can almost sense the Oklahom-ians...Oklahomans...Oklahommms...waiting to explode in excitement at seeing a jersey with the name "Weaver" on it.

Apparently the team has given a due date on all this team business: the end of the month. That's not much time, most likely in the next two weeks, for us to be blessed with the name thunder (KAPOW!!!) and some bobcats-esque color of neon orange, salmon, and burnt siena. I, for one, would be happy with any color except blue and black. Nearly every team has those colors in their color scheme. I say go pink or go home.

Stay tuned to see this weather-related sports business shake out!

Awoooooooooo....what a bad uniform

Fans of the Minnesota Timberwolves and...well...fans of the wolf animal rejoice, for your team has unveiled its new look. -Actually, The Howeva Files(amongst others) unveiled it a while ago, but who am I to care?

Yes, folks, the Timberwolves are now officially the "Wolves", so says it on their jerseys. What's that you say? They ARE still the Timberwolves, but just shortened it on their fancy shirts? Great...good to hear that's not confusing. Apparently the team used to have Wolves on their jerseys back in the early 90s, the true heyday of the team being awful. Now McHale can start getting the team back to it's true place in the NBA with non-subtle sucking.

And here we go, some stars to get fans excited! Stars like Mike Miller, wearer of the Kevin Sorbo/Aragorn-esque shoulder-length straight hair. Part of me likes Mike Miller, the same part that enjoys Scot Pollard and other misplaced freaky white guys. -But another part of me (call it the "rational" part) thinks it isn't the best idea to start marketing your team's new look around someone who you got as a toss-in during your swap of 1st round draft picks.

At least the team hasn't completely abandoned the godzilla-sized MONSTER WOLF (seen below), standing tall over thousands of pine trees. As crummy as things get with the team, the Minnesota fan can continue to claim to others that their logo is perhaps the least child-friendly, most evil and poop-your-pants-inducing logo out there. Once this large-nostriled animal is stricken from team apparell, you can officially stick a fork in this franchise. At least the Vikings have Adrian Peterson!