Thursday, December 13, 2007

SHOCKING NEWS: PRO ATHLETES SLEEP AROUND

For those into celebrity gossip, you may already know this, but it's been revealed that the recently wed Tony Parker has already had one affair. Actually, it was a major upgrade for Parker to go from Eva Longoria to the hotter and younger French model Alexandra Paressant (who was once known for dating Ronaldinho!?!?!?!?!?).

According to Paressant, the reason for Parker's wandering is that Longoria is terrified of his sperm.

"He said that Eva sexually speaking does not want to do certain things. She does not want to make love in front of a mirror, does not like certain position and thinks that sperm gives acne.”

TO ALL MY FEMALE READERS AND POTENTIAL ONE NIGHT STANDS: Eva Longoria is bat shit crazy. Do not believe her lies. My sperm cures blindness. Continue to go about your regularly scheduled fucking.

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