The NBA wisely does not have any games scheduled today because they know the bright lights and loud noises would anger most of America. That "sneaker-against-the-floor-squeak" sound probably drove one too many people to change the channel. I personally use the words of Hubie Brown as hangover medicine, but that's just me.
As we pop the advil bottle open, let's all do a silent nod to the fact that there actually was some basketball played last night:
-Orlando beat Chicago in overtime thanks a winning shot from the superhero known as "Turkoglu". Those people that bet Turk would look like a sure All Star this season are smarter than you or I, my friend. They also do not exist.
-Portland's 13 game winning streak was snapped against Utah, meaning they won every game in the month of December except the first and last one. No Greg Oden, ladies and gents. Scary.
-Toronto, looking good on and off these days, rallied to beat the New Orleans Hornets last night. Chris Bosh, who started off the year pretty slow, is once again terrorizing opponents. Watch out, ladies who like long necks, your heartthrob is back.
-As soon as Don Nelson got thrown out of the game, the Warriors rallied and beat the Houston Rockets. Nelson (pusher of the wine seen if you scroll to the bottom of our site) is so popular amongst his players that they said afterwards that they were inspired by his outburst. I think they were just defending the guy who was throwing the best New Year's party later.
That's about it as far as the good games go. Detroit destroyed the Bucks and other stuff happened, but you probably already left your computer to go back to bed at this point. Best of luck with your hangovers, America!