Tuesday, February 26, 2008

It's A Fun Nickname...Right Up Until The Brain Tests

Bobcats star forward Gerald Wallace's nickname is "Crash", which is a cute reference to his penchant to tossing his body around the floor like a rag doll for his hapless, neon orange team. People watch him and Dwayne Wade run around and laugh and cheer like they're watching one of those bears on unicycles at the circus.

Well, maybe it's time to stop using the "Crash" nickname with a smirk and a giggle, and for someone to say, "So, uh, dude?...Can you take it down a notch?"

Why? Well, today Gerald Wallace is going to the brain doctor to undergo tests. Apparently, he just recently got his 4th concussion in 4 years, something which seems very difficult to achieve. You know you have issues when you get a brain-injury hat trick and THEN some. The latest concussion involved an errant elbow from Sacramento Kings' Mikki "all elbows" Moore, which knocked Wallace unconscious and made everyone really nervous for a while. If you've ever seen the Bobcats mascot "Rufus Lynx" nervous, you know something bad just went down.
This is only the latest in a list of completely bizarre Bobcats injuries. Let's recap:

Adam Morrison - Diabetes

Gerald Wallace - Fragile Brain

Derek Anderson - Dibilitating Dental Issues

Sean May & Othella Harrington - Knee Injuries have knee injuries, which have knee injuries

In all seriousness, we hope that Gerald Wallace gets better and stops hitting his skull. We all see how annoying Steve Young is on ESPN these days after all his concussions, and if that is the road Gerald's brain is headed down we need to give him a helmet NOW before it's too late.


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Gerald Wallace needs to wear a mouthguard. All those concussions are from people's jaws getting hit in a weird way.

Mouthguard now...so no droolcup later

Taylor Cunningham said...

sort of like serenity now...insanity later

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, I thought Adam Morrison was injured by a torn ligamnet on his left knee? I guess having diabetes doesn't help either

Jordan Geary said...

Yeah, that too Midday.